My mom warned me that some married folks find it harder to deal with money when they have some than when they have none. I can see why that would happen (although it didn't happen with us), simply because there are so many choices. Even once you agree on a dollar amount for a general grouping like charity, how much of it should go to medical research? How much to human rights activism? The environment? The poor and needy? The arts? How much should be local? national? international? I know that every little bit matters, but I can't help feeling that one organization could do a bit more with $100 than ten could with $10.
I think the list we came up with is good. It includes major categories about which we feel strongly, including a memorial donation for markgritter's grandmother, but it doesn't spread things too thin. Still, it felt strange to say, "Oh, sorry, no money for you, cancer; we're giving to heart disease this year."