Marissa Lingen (mrissa) wrote,
Marissa Lingen
mrissa

Clothes. Again. Sigh.

I was hoping for shorts that would fit my big Scando thighs -- and look, can I say how very annoying this culture is, in that regard? I would like to be able to express, neutrally, that my thighs are slightly bigger than the standard clothing designer assumption for the rest of my body size. I would not like to convey that I am whining, "my thiiiighs are so faaaaaaat," because in fact they are not, and not only that, but unlike many women with not-fat thighs, I am well aware that they are not. They are what happens when women of Scando ancestry work out: there is more muscle there than most clothing designers plan for. This is not an aesthetic problem for anybody even remotely relevant, including me. It's just a practical problem when purchasing clothing, particularly shorts, particularly the last couple of years, when I'm seeing a lot of shorts that are cut much closer to the body than seems strictly necessary. Long, extremely-fitted shorts do not flatter very many people. In fact, I theorize maybe one, total, over the age of 12. Fourteen if she's a late-bloomer. I'm just sayin', and they never listen to me.

(Ever wonder why I wear so many skirts when the weather permits? This is part of why: they almost always make skirts that acknowledge the existence of hips and/or thighs.)

Aaaaanyway. So I went to the girl jock online store and ordered a pair of shorts, on the theory that if anybody understands about the deficiencies of most clothing designers re: muscular legs, it would be the girl jock online store. (Or the other girl jock online store, but most of their shorts seemed like firmly clothes to work out in rather than clothes I could stop off for dinner in. And I don't need shorts to work out in. Got as many as I need, got 'em cheap at Target a million years ago.)

While I was there I poked around and decided to see how well their stuff will fit me, so I ordered two skirts and a dress along with the shorts. (This is the other reason I wear a lot of skirts/dresses: I am comfortable in them and like them, so when I'm looking for clothes, I look at them.) And the answer is: okayish. The shorts fit all right. One of the two skirts fit all right. The other skirt was cut higher in the waist, and as a result did not fit. And the dress looked fine as long as I didn't move. Like, at all. The minute I moved, it bunched and bagged, and you could see that it did not even slightly fit in the waist, and that it was not the sort of dress designed not to even slightly fit in the waist. It was just too darn big. Like they do.

So back those two things go, and I can have another pair of shorts from the girl jock online store, and that will do. Sort of. I am to be a godmother (EEEEEEEEEE!), and I have no idea what I will wear for the actual occasion. I also have no idea what I'm wearing to Minicon. On the up side, it's a con, so if I panic and fling on jeans and a bland top, no one will bat an eye. On the down side, it's a con: it's one of the few large social events where I care about the opinion of even a small fraction of the people in attendance. So it seems like a waste not to wear something fun, given that I actually do have things I consider fun to wear. But Minicon is hard to plan for because who knows what the weather will be like in Minnesota for Easter? No matter when Easter is, you really just don't know. One of you said, "I'm visiting Minnesota in April. Tell me there won't be snow." I could not make that promise. (Although this year -- harumph.) So -- I don't know. Sundress, sweater, sundress and sweater -- it's hard to say. And I don't really want to wear long-sleeved black items for Easter, which overlaps with Minicon, and I'm observing both. So...I really don't know, people. I'm making the "ackack what will I wear?" post early, but I expect to remain stumped.

Clothes. It's as I keep saying: if I didn't ever enjoy clothes, all this would be much easier. It's the expectation that I might like them that's the problem.
Tags: cons, girliness, til i drop
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