August 17th, 2006

food

Savages and Russian Grocery Reports

In the realm of typos: it is probably better for carpet to be lavish than for it to be lavosh. You'd have to replace the carpet an awfully lot in the latter case. So I changed that line.

Not in the realm of typos: I just wrote a check to "Waste Management Savage." There is a town called Savage, MN, not far from here, and they are the source of our trash and recycling collection. There are also signs that say things like, "Highway Cleanup: Savage Quilters/Savage Jaycees" or "Savage Presbyterian Church, next right." These signs are a source of endless delight for me. I imagine the Waste Management Savage as a middle-aged Minnesota blond guy, thinning hair, kind of sunburnt through his scalp, wearing or toting an amalgamation of everything mainstream European cultures have made up as "savage" stuff about other places. He sits at a normal desk in a standard grey cubicle processing the checks for the waste management company, but instead of pictures of his kids, he has shrunken heads and the machinery-beadwork some Native Americans pass off on the rubes. This is the kind of stuff I think about when I'm paying the bills.

The "Savage Lions Club" signs just don't delight me like the others. Savage Lions Clubs are normal. If it was a Tame or Cultured Lions Club, that would be notable. But I don't think Cultured, MN, is an actual place.

Which is maybe too bad.

Anyway, Minsk Market of Eagan, because I told kalmn I would. Collapse )
hippo!

Fill in the blank!

Entertain me, monkeys!

I just typed the phrase, "I fumbled in my pack for two items no young woman seeking her fortune should go without:". And then my hindbrain filled in, "Tampons and a switchblade!" Umm. Not quite.

So what goes there?

(Not in my story. I already know what goes there in my story. But if yours entertains me enough and you don't thief it for yourself, I might be willing to write it for you.)