Marissa Lingen (mrissa) wrote,
Marissa Lingen
mrissa

Someone knows the words.

1. If you are preparing an otherwise-lovely church service, please recall that "Amazing Grace" comes with its very own tune. It's a nice tune, one comes out fairly well if you try to make it jazzy, folk-rocky, Gospelly, whatever. If you choose to use an alternate tune, however, please consider a tune whose best-known lyrics have nothing to do with a whorehouse, as it will cause great consternation among visitors to your church who have to stifle giggles as their brain supplies the missing lyrics: "Amazing grace, how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me. It's been the ruin of many a poor girl, and God, I know I'm one." And etc.

2. If you are attempting to sell a non-alcohol product, may I suggest a tune other than "What Shall We Do With a Drunken Sailor" for the background music to your pitch? While there are nearly infinitely many verses to this particular chanty, "Make him buy a new Toyota" is not so much a positive statement about your company for those of us who do not fall into the drunken sailor category.

(This is, of course, in addition to my note of some years back that while some would consider CCR's "Fortunate Son" an extremely patriotic song, dissent being a virtue in an open government, we do know that the words after "Some folks are born, made to wave the flag, ooh the red, white and blue" are "but when the band plays 'Hail to the Chief,' ooh, they point the cannon at you." I'm not sure whether Wrangler Jeans intended to align itself with the firing squad in question or the fired upon, but it certainly baffled me.)

I'm going to lie back down now.
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