(The title of this entry is from a Shel Silverstein poem called "Rudy Felsh." The line about how Rudy Felsh is likely to go to hell or jail or Canada struck me as silly when I was small and read it. When I got a little bigger, American history came down on my head with a thud again, and I realized why an American of Silverstein's age -- and the speaker in the poem's age -- would have going to Canada as an option with the other two. Sometimes I think my life is a series of history crashing in and me going, "Ohhhhhh.")
In honor of upcoming six years of lawfully wedded bliss, I extravagantly bought a new can-opener that is not the absolute cheapest model available, and also a new toilet brush. Some people say, "What would happen to our society if two men or two women were allowed to get married?" I'll tell you what would happen: five to ten years later they'd have to start replacing some of the stuff they'd gotten for wedding presents. Watch for it to happen in Canada. You heard it here first.